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One Gallon Hip Flask

This is a one gallon hip flask. These are the reasons you may need one: 1. I’ve tried booking hotels in two Australian cities this week, and apparently they are all full. I have also tried catching several taxis this week, and waddaya know, they’re all full too. Based on this field research, I’ve come to the conclusion that the planet is overpopulating and we’re all going to sufffocate. Let’s get drunk so we pass out before that happens.

2. If you’re a student, you’ve probably just finished the semester/year/degree. Soon you will learn that very little of the knowledge that you have crammed and slaved over is of any use. You need a drink.

3. If you’re already in the work force, it’s 2012 strategy time. This means that every client and their dog needs you to turn their business into Amazon, and while you’re at it, find them the new Old Spice Guy. Why not keep them drinking until 2012 – maybe they’ll lose these ambitions.

4. It’s the freakin’ silly season.