Rare Exports: a Finnish movie about Santa

Santa eating kids. Santa torturing kids. Santa mutilating kids. I don’t know about you, but I hate Christmas. Okay, hate is a very strong word. I really hate Christmas. Everyone gets stressed out, then eats too much and whinges about being fat. Also, the amount of presents a kid gets has nothing to do with being naughty or nice — it’s how rich their parents are, and how much guilt they feel.

So this Finnish film about the ‘real’ Santa Claus provided welcome light relief. You see, Santa was really a devil type dude who used to cook all the naughty kids, until hundreds of years ago when he was frozen by some angry villagers. Which was all fine, until he’s unearthed by an archaeological dig, and the kids again start disappearing. It’s not actually that gruesome and probably suitable for teenagers. However, it does the suspense well, is a hilarious and refreshing take on the ‘real’ meaning of Christmas, and comes with an awesomely twisted ending.