It’s as easy as herding cats. Firstly grab your feline with two hands, place said cat on your face and, erm, with your other hand take a photo. Voila! You’re cat-bearding. This wonderful new Internet craze is easier than owling, takes less effort than the Harlem shake and is safer than planking. Maybe. Hithhhhh, Wrowwwww, hissssssss…

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Nekofont. The internet is powered by cats, so you might as well write in cats too. If you’re secretly 8, like me, you’ll want to test it out with swears. Then you can get on with your life. (Not really, because you are writing words with cats).

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Despite the recent fascination with everything cats, I don’t like felines. I don’t care if Twitter made an alternate cat version that’s super cute. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I’m allergic to the little fur-balls and don’t enjoy their obnoxious memes. So when I came across this bizarre ad series by the Japanese company Tange and Nakimushi Peanuts, I was greatly disturbed. How could anyone even think of letting a cat rub its furry body all over their sushi? This is wrong on so many levels.

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It says here on the site that it’s ‘just a bunch of athletes competing for the sweetest kittens’. Whether it’s football, water polo or basketball, the athletes will take care of the cat, thank you very much.

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I’m not going to pretend that I wasn’t a big fan of the “breading” trend that swept internet cats recently, but I did find myself wondering where we could possibly go from there. We must not rest on our cat-posting laurels. Fortunately, I think there is now a step up. You get all the thrills of cats sticking their heads through something, with the added allure of hilarious role play. But where to go from here?

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What can we say again? We just really love Wendy MacNaughton (check out her To-Do Venn diagram and Universal Laws of Safe Distance solar system map here). She recently illustrated another cool pie chart breaking down the thoughts of cat owners. Spot-on, too.

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What, genetically modified cats? A San Diego-based company, Allerca Lifestyle Pets, actually claimed they could offer hypoallergenic kitties for folks with allergies. The cats, said to have gone through selective breeding to leave out with the glycoprotein that makes cat-allergic people sick, sneeze non-stop or break out into hives were reportedly sold for $8,000.

This appears to be a scam, and while we thought GM cats were a thing of the past, a researcher, Eric Poeschla, basically produced three glowing cats two years ago by getting a green fluorescent protein gene into eggs from which the animals eventually grew. Seriously, what did the cats ever do to us for us to treat them like this?

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The Human-to-Cat Translator claims to be able to analyze any voice recording and convert most human languages into cat meows. The free version comes with 3 feline voices, which sounds like it’s enough to impress any house cat. Apparently the app comes bundled with over 175 samples from more than 25 cats, or ‘different kinds of meowing, bird sounds, mouse sounds, purring and one very angry kitty’. Still, use this at your cat’s peril: one guy left a review that said ‘These cat sounds all sound like you are harming cats, and my cat agrees. I think you gave him depression.’

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Cats In The Alley started as two soul mate cats who were living in an alley. Dizzy and Tabs are punk rock cats who like books and libraries and making things out of stuff thoughtless people have thrown out. They don’t like eminent domain and things that would ruin the alley. What I really think? It’s about doing the best you can with what you’ve got. Cats In The Alley is updated Sundays and Thursdays.

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For all their fluffiness and flakiness, we knew the cats weren’t just messing about on Earth. These terrorizing feline monsters remind us who’s boss. We should just roll over and play dead right after we surrender everything to them.

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For all you Parks and Rec fans out there, this is the cat-based Tumblr for you. We all know that there’s a million cat photos on the internet, but apparently there are quite a handful that look like Ron Swanson. Who would have thought?

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We all know that cats dominate the internet, but now they’re taking over the realm of science too. This hilarious tumblr shows cats experimenting in the laboratory and other scientific locations. If you’re a cat lover who’s feeling a bit scientific, you can submit a photo of your own.

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Domestic cats have been getting bad press lately for as one of the world’s top invasive species. Now, thanks to evolutionary biologist Jaroslav Flegr — whom National Geographic dubbed a ‘cat detective — we know they can make us all a bit cuckoo too. The guy discovered that the toxoplasma gondii parasite that’s pervasive in cats can infect not only rats, but humans.

He’s been there: ‘I thought it might explain some of my strange behaviors—ones that are nonadaptive for me but adaptive for a parasite that needs to get to a new host… in humans, we found that it greatly slows reaction time, which can influence the risk of a traffic accident. Infected people also tend to be less conscientious. And our male subjects considered the scent of cat urine to be quite pleasurable.’ Uh oh. Consider yourself warned.

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YouTube user moonli927 has a cat video that has garnered over 2.1 million views in just one fortnight. It’s impossible not to see why. In it, her white cat Kido basically plays multiple rounds of the shell game, expertly pawing out the correct shell every single time. Unexpected bonus: the cat narrows his eyes every time he makes a pick at first, but soon develops a game face by the end. Fast learners, these cats.

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Haha, the Buzzfeed folks had us in stitches with this bunch of images showing how Jeremy Renner is really Grumpy Cat — yes, the same Grumpy Cat that has become a meme hit of late. Have a look and we’ll be damned if you don’t see the likeness.

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There’s no question that cats rule the internet, and this hilarious Tumblr is proof of that fact. Seriously, what’s not to love about a blog dedicated to comparing cats to pin-up girls? The similarities are uncanny.

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Cats scratch stuff. There’s a skill in there, we’re sure. Suck UK has the ultimate scratch mat for cats in the form of a turntable that’s just asking to be scratched. Of course, you can always surrender your real turntable over to these talented paws for a potentially wicked mix.

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We knew it: cats plan to take over the world. From forming secret societies and undergoing ‘highly intensive training’ to mastering levitation and being the perfect Mata Hari, we know what they’re up, and they’re up to no good. Here’s a whole lot of pictorial proof, thanks to the folks from The Ark in Space, to show for it.

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Heil Kitlers. When Mashable recently ran a gallery of the 15 best cat memes ever, we were astonished not to have found out about the Kitlers — cats that look like Adolf Hitler, with a dash of black above their mouths — until now. We’ve always been fond of tuxedo cats, but Kitlers just takes our love for tuxedo cats a furry notch up. Of course, an entire blog is dedicated entirely to these kitties that look like Hitler. Enjoy.

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Here’s your latest time-waster – a super-simple site with a bunch of black and white photos of cats bouncing around in seemingly random ways. As they lose velocity, you can click to throw them back up in the air. Way friendlier than those angry birds.

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