If you’re hunting for something a little different for your Christmas tree this year, perhaps vagina baubles are what you’ve been looking for.
Yes, that’s right, you can now decorate your tree with felt vaginas.
Unsurprisingly, the alternative tree decoration isn’t something you’ll be able to find at Kmart. No, as with most genitalia creations, you’ll find that they’re only available on Etsy.
They’re created by Feltmelons, an online store that specialise in felt vulvas and boobs. Known as vaginaments, they come in four sizes, as well as the one-lipped kind and a pierced variety. Just like in real life, they’re all unique.
I'm taking these round the postie today, they're off to new homes ❤ The Felt Melons Once a Year sale is on till May 7th! 20% off store-wide, use ALLTHEVAGINAS to kindly grab all the vaginas 😍 . The shop will be shut for holidays and craft show prep from May 25 – June 14, so if you had a hankering or need a hostess gift or 8, now's the time x (remember, she who hesitates…) . #vaginamandala #allthevaginas #feltvagina #feltvulva #yonipower #christmasvagina #feltmelons #vaginament
Iris (heathered purple, aqua blue, lime green) has been a One Lip Wonder mainstay since I opened in 2013. She's now a big snowy sized version, too! 🍇❤️ Note: USA-bound orders are shipping via USPS and include tracking, from now till January 31, whee! Get your order in before the crunchtime waitlist 🙂 🤶💌 #vaginament #feltmelons
What?! A 25 Days of Vulva celebration?! This is super better than my advent calendar! Count me in ❤ Thanks, @veronica.lea.ink 😚 . From @veronica.lea.ink – Today is the first day of my 25 Days of Vulva celebration in preparation for the release of my blog, Vulva, Ink. For each day, I will show artwork, a product, and other things that depict vulvas. Day 25, I will release the blog header. Today, enjoy these fantastic vaginaments by @feltmelons Each vaginament is unique, and there are diverse hairstyles (looks like these are rocking the 80s?)! #sexblog #vulva #sexeducation #womensandgenderstudies #25DaysofVulva
Each bauble has been handcrafted from felt and the colour options are endless.
The clitoris is a tiny, jingling bell, and Feltmelons say that if you hold the ornament up to your ear, you’ll “hear waves crashing on distant, rocky shores”. We’re not entirely sure that’s true, but we’re willing to give it a go.
If vaginas aren’t for you, Feltmelons also do boob ornaments that support breast cancer research, and if hanging private parts on your tree is a little too much, you can always get a magnet or a keychain.
So, if you’re wanting your Christmas tree to stand out from others this year this is definitely the way to do it, but the verdict is still out on as to whether these are cute or not. What do you think?